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I Have a Stunning New Fantasy in Thoughts for My Girlfriend. I Suppose I Ought to Simply Go for It.

The way to Do It’s Slate’s intercourse recommendation column. Have a query? Ship it to Stoya and Wealthy right hereIt’s nameless!

Pricey The way to Do It,

I like taking place on my girlfriend and he or she is a giant fan of it too.

Recently, she’s needed me to go down on her for a bit, then have intercourse together with her for a bit, after which proceed taking place on her once more. Once I try this her orgasms are actually intense, and I’ve began to fantasize about taking place on her once more after I’ve completed. I’m unsure the best way to carry up the topic together with her as a result of I don’t know if she’ll be weirded out by it, or ought to I simply go for it and see what occurs?

—Curious About Cleanup

Pricey Curious About Cleanup,

The most effective method relies on your dynamic along with your girlfriend—and whether or not she’s extra of a verbal opt-in consent form of individual or an in-the-moment opt-out form of individual. On one finish of the spectrum, you would possibly say to her, “I’m anxious that is going to bizarre you out, however right here goes; I actually wish to go down on you after I’ve completed—how does that concept really feel for you?” One choice within the center is to attend till you’re cuddling, post-sex, and inform her about your fantasy. One other center choice is to precise your want after you’ve completed however nonetheless in that second. And the opposite excessive is, sure, to only go for it and see what occurs.

Pondering again on the way you’ve each expressed wishes previously, and what approaches she’s been most receptive to, might help you determine which tactic to take right here.

—Jessica Stoya

Extra Recommendation From Slate

Not too long ago, I used to be hooking up with a man from Grindr who was behaving a bit oddly. He invited me to his residence constructing however mentioned we needed to meet within the constructing’s pool showers and never his residence as a result of he was being “discreet.” I assumed that meant he didn’t need the neighbors seeing him bringing random males.